Someone obsessively dedicated to their passions, like Picasso, can also be obsessively dedicated to womanizing. A bubbly extrovert who makes everyone feel special can find introspection with themselves difficult. The analytical thinker, so valued at work, can’t let go of negative critical thinking at home.
There are double edges on all these swords. Our gifts are often the flip of our flaws and vise versa. Or should we say vice versa.
Here’s a thought: Own it. Own it all. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t work on improving flaws or being a better human, but the general acknowledgement and acceptance that you are a whole priceless package can be empowering. Why not look at what drives your flaws and see that it likely drives positive things too?
The big picture person is a visionary… and a scatterbrain. So what? They can place people in their lives who appreciate them and help them with the absent mindedness, so that they can focus on the vision.
All of us can embrace our messes and make them a key piece of our positive story. Here’s How:
Embrace your Limits and Failures:
In the case of our obsessive visionary, she may never create a detailed business plan, but she can find a partner who can and in this way start the business of her dreams. Or maybe she can look to other obsessive visionaries to see how they managed to get it done.
Sometimes, we see an ideal, we hold onto it, make it a goal, and then start beating ourselves up when we can’t seem to make progress. Maybe we do just need more dedication and discipline. Or maybe we need to turn rejection into redirection. It’s hard to know when to change course. But, if you see yourself, know yourself as this whole complicated package of values and motivations, talents and flaws, it can sometimes become easier to discern direction in life.
Love your Whole Limited Self:
Embracing your whole self means loving, or at least accepting, your whole self. Stop with the the internal self criticism and self loathing dialogue. It’s not useful. You deserve respect, but you can’t expect to get it until you give it to yourself. And yes, you can love yourself and still make yourself a better person. Even tough love has the word "love in it, and the tough part is not even necessarily the best motivator.
Write your Story:
You can be on a never-ending journey of learning and redemption, or you can be in a tragic novel where the main character always loses. It really is your choice. You are writing your life story -- in your head and in the real world. If you think it’s written only by circumstance, you’re wrong. Create your own karma by understanding that flaws and failures are not the defining forces in life. They can sometimes be springboards that launch us towards better things. They can almost always be signposts that turn our perspectives and encourage redemptive action.
Seeing yourself as a complete package -- a complex human with strengths and weaknesses -- can help you come to terms with flaws and find your gifts. It’s likely these things live together under the amazing umbrella of you.
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